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Saturday, August 17, 2013

Charging people to the Game

Many times you hear guys say the phrase: Charge em’ to the game and keep it moving. What does this mean? Simple.  It means a person cuts their losses on the relationship with someone, cuts off all contact with that person and move on with their life.

Who can be charged to the game? Anyone. Girlfriends, friends, and even family members.  Sometimes you even have to charge a job or a neighborhood to the game if you plan on making positive steps in your life.

Brothers and Sisters, When you’re trying to go somewhere in life, some people can’t come with you. They refuse to change their toxic and dysfunctional ways.  And in those cases it’s just best to simply STOP having contact with them.

Some may think charging people to the game is harsh.  But it’s necessary. Just like people throw away stuff they don’t need anymore, you need to cleanse your life of garbage people who no longer enrich it in any way shape or form.

Sure you may be close to these people.  You may even love them. But what they’re doing and how they’re living is destructive to you. And you don’t need their dysfunction, drama and negative energy invading your life.

Toxic people are like crabs in a barrel. Just when you’re trying to come up, they pull you down. They’re looking for some company to join them in their misery. Don’t let that be you!

The longer you stay around toxic people the sicker you’ll become. Eventually you wind up radiating the same negative energy and thinking the same negative way they do. Instead of moving ahead in your life you wind up going nowhere as you wind up carrying their emotional baggage and personal garbage.

How do you charge people to the game? Simple. Just stop calling them. Just stop talking to them. Delete their numbers out of your cell phone. Delete their e-mail from your address book. Unfriend them on Facebook and stop following them on Twitter. Block them on YouTube.

If they come to your house, tell them you just don’ have time.  If they invite you somewhere, simply just decline. Sooner or later they’ll get the message you just don’t want to be bothered by them anymore.

Life is too short to deal with people who bring nothing but drama and dysfunction with them everywhere they go. Let them take their problems someplace else.

I’ve had to charge people to the game many times in my life. I’ve had to charge schools to the game. I’ve even had to charge jobs to the game.

Back when I was in Park West High School 25 years ago, I had to charge a lot of people to the game. Most of the people I was in class with were more focused on boyfriends, girlfriends, sneakers, clothe, slinging crack rocks and other bullshit than grades and getting their diplomas.  Their toxic nonsense was dragging me down.

There was no way I was going to graduate and get my diploma in that toxic environment. So I charged those people to the game and moved on to Taft High School in the Bronx and focused on getting my High School diploma.

12 years ago when I was working at a nonproifit as part of the Americorps* VISTA Program  the vice president of the program where I was working at the time took me to lunch and told me he didn’t have a place for me in the organization. Even though I had done great work for them he decided I didn’t fit into his vision for the organization.

Instead of trying to kiss his ass and beg him for a job there, I just charged the job to the game and kept moving on to the next job.

Five years ago I had to charge my job at a public college library to the game. When I realized that my supervisor and her boss were liars, I had no choice but to let go of a good Civil Service job with benefits.

On the surface it looked like they let me go at the end of the week, but what they didn’t know was I had already charged them to the game days before.

I’m not going to lie to you brothers and sisters, charging people to the game isn’t going to be easy. It’s going hurt, especially if you have close ties to those people or that place in your life. But you have to do what’s right for you and what keeps you moving forward in life.

Sometimes people aren’t right for us. And sometimes situations aren’t right for us. And the longer we stay in a dysfunctional situation the worse it’s going to get. It’s better to part ways from the company of dy sfunctional people before you wind up mired in their misery.

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