Robin The Boy Wonder is Dead Again…*YAWN*

All the media outlets are reporting the death of Damian Wayne, the fourth Robin the Boy Wonder. It’s supposed to be a big national event.

Whatever.

Another meaningless death of a fictional character. It’s like they happen every couple of months these days in comics.

Didn’t we just have the funeral for Professor X for the third time a couple of months ago? I guess Shawn should have his black suit pressed to go to the funeral of this imaginary character.

But he’ll be staying home and watching the game that day. As I’ve stated before, comic book character deaths are not news. They’re just a last desperate grab for attention by comic book publishers when sales are low.

This isn’t the first time a Robin has died. Way back in 1988 when Shawn was in high school, Jason Todd, the second Robin died after he came out on the losing end of a 900 number poll. Beaten to death with a crowbar and blown up in the Middle East. We all thought that was going to stick when fans embraced Tim Drake in the Robin role in 1989.

But when DC Comics got desperate for a story in 2004, they brought his lame ass back through Superboy Prime punching reality. A cop-out explanation for bringing back a loser ass character no one liked 20 years ago. And most people still don’t like now.

But on hearing about this allegedly sad news of the Boy Wonder’s demise the speculators are out trying to capitalize on the national frenzy. These thirsty Simps are hurrying to the comic shop hoping to buy up all the issues in the hopes they’ll turn into a huge payoff. Some are trying to make it look like people are going to pay $20 for this big event comic.

Don’t believe the hype. And don’t fall for the game.

Shawn’s here to tell you to keep your money in your wallet. There’s no gold at the end of that Yellow Brick Road. Just Dan Didio, Jim Lee, Bob Harrass, and all of DC Comics Editorial laughing at you. That’s right the joke is on YOU.

You plunk down your $4 and buy multiple copies of a comic think you’re going to get a big return for your investment a few years later.

Only to find out the very comics you paid $4 today for are now worth a quarter or less. Shawn has a crate full of comics from the Death of Superman era that are worth about that much now. How long has Superman been back to life? Twenty years now and counting.

Death in comics used to mean something 40 years ago. But today it’s just a gimmick to get a short-term sales spike for a comic book publisher. When all the fanfare of the “death” of a popular character is over and sales are at an all-time low again, they bring them back like they did with Barry Allen, the Silver Age Flash.

Comic book characters die and come back to life like Wile. E. Coyote in a Looney Tunes cartoon these days. Death is the one thing that doesn’t stick in a Marvel or DC Comic anymore. Captain America died five years ago. Batman has died twice in the last couple of years. And twenty years ago the death of Superman was one of the events that triggered the collapse of the comic book industry.

As a long time comic reader and former comic collector I’m urging everyone not to go running down to the comic shop to buy that issue where the fourth Robin the Boy Wonder Dies for the first time. This comic isn’t going to be worth anything. In six months it’ll be reprinted in a trade paperback. Six months later it’ll be reprinted in a hardcover omnibus. And in a year or two when sales of comics hit an all-time low or when writers paint themselves into a corner Damian Wayne will be back in the land of living comic book characters.

And the only thing you’ll be out is $4. Don’t be a sucker. Save your money and don’t waste your time. Maybe if enough people stopped spending money on these “Events” comic book writers would actually take the time to write a real story that means something for once.